Wow! I can't belive how fast it's going

Well, I have scheduled my surgery! I will be going under the knife on October 20th at 9am CST.

I am both scared and excited at the same time. I feel a lot like I did when I got towards the end of my pregnancy with Zabba. I knew it was going to hurt, but I was really looking forward to the end result.

A lot of people are confused as to why I would have a surgery to lose weight, but when I try to explain that it's not about the weight and how I look, it's all about how I feel. Weighing in at around 300 lbs, is very hard on my body.

Here are some of the things I am looking forward to after my surgery:

1. Being able to see my feet
2. Being able to chase Zabba
3. Being able to go for a walk without pain or having to stop and rest
4. Being able to get on the floor and play
5. Fitting into a booth at a restaurant without my stomach touching or hanging on the table
6. Not having people stare at me and then when I look at them pretend they weren't staring
7. Not being the biggest out of all of my friends
8. Not having to need a bra for both the front and back (I really hate my back fat)
9. More self-esteem/feeling better about myself.
10. Not having to shop at Layne Bryant
11. Buying cute bras and underwear that I don't have to take out a loan for
12. Having my husband be attracted to me again
13. Not being the mom that watches from the sidelines instead of getting in and climbing around the park equipment
14. Not looking at a chair and wondering if it will hold me
15. Being embarrassed by how I look

I know some of these are very selfish things I'm looking forward to, but that doesn't mean I'm not looking forward to them. Mostly I'm looking forward to just being healthy again and being able to go out and do what "normal" people do.

I haven't always been as big as I am; as a matter of fact, this is the biggest I have ever been in my life. I have always been a big girl and the thing I'm most scared of is having my daughter go through the teasing and taunting that I have had to go through growing up. What "they" say is true-Kids are cruel and often speak the truth.

I have heard people ask my why I'm taking the easy way out and having surgery, but I just want you to know that this is NOT the easy way. If I didn't think that this surgery would save my life and make my life better I wouldn't do it.

I will be restricted on what I can and can't eat for the rest of my life and I will be required to go to doctor's appointments for the rest of my life as well. In addition, the surgery causes mal-absorption so I will have to be on several supplements (mineral, vitamin, fiber and protein) for the rest of my life. If I don't take these, I run the risk of getting very sick and having all of my hair fall out. That's all in addition to the possibility of death.

So you can see my progress I am going to take a before picture sometime between now and October 20, 2009 and then one on the 20th of every month for the next year.

I GOT APPROVED!!

I finally received notice from my insurance company that I have been approved for my surgery. I'm so excited I can't stand it! Now I just have to meet with the surgeon which I will be doing on Wednesday and then hopefully we will have more concrete time frame.

The woman at the office said that I should be getting my surgery with in the next month to month and a half.

My baby is not a baby any more!

Abby went to her first day of pre-school today. I have to say that I am so proud of her-no tears or anything (on either of our parts!)!

I will come back and post pictures and tell the whole story tomorrow.

Love, Hate

Last night I woke up at 12:30am and could not fall back to sleep until some time after 3:30am. I remember it was right after I looked at the clock and decided it was pointless for me to stay in bed if I had to get up in less than 3 hours.

Well, anyway to the point. While I was laying in bed counting the bumps in the ceiling, I was thinking of a list of things I love and a list of things I hate. Then I thought to myself "this would be a good blog post"

So here is my list:

Love

1. My daughter
2. My dog
3. Chocolate
4. My family (crap, I think this should have been further up the list...sorry folks! I really do love you more than my dog!)
5. Learning

Hate

1. Ignorance
2. Pity
3. Dishes
4. Laundry
5. Stupid Drivers

There is so much more that I thought of last night, but for some reason I can't remember them all now. Next time I will have to write them down so I can add to my list. I also distinctly remember my Hate list being longer than my Love list. I think I may have to work on that.

Very thankful

I am very thankful today. I'm thankful because my husband is home!

If you don't know what happened, Friday morning he called me and asked me to bring him to the hospital because the pain in his stomach was worse and he was sweating and dizzy. I brought him into the ER and we found out he has diverticulitis.

Diverticulitis is an infection in the wall of his intestines/colon. Suffice it to say that it's not a pretty disease (not that diseases are pretty mind you).

However, with changes in his diet and exercise he should be able to live a long and somewhat healthy life style and avoid having surgery to have any of the infected area removed. I personally would like to avoid this since he does not deal well with illness.

Giveaway alert!!

The wonderful Merynne over at Hair for the Mini Diva is having a give away! She has some great products at her etsy shop. Go check her out!!

I almost forgot

I almost forgot how easy it was to get up and get ready on my own.

Wednesday night Zabba asked that I call Auntie Mimi so she could talk to her. Once on the phone Zabba informed my sister-in-law that she was coming over to spend the night. Then she promptly handed me the phone and started crying when she was told she wouldn't be able to go that night.

Well, anyway we worked it out so that Zabba went to spend the night on Thursday night. Let me tell you she was not sad to see me leave her either! After we walked through the door of the house she turned to me and said "Bye mom! You can go now!" and then looked sad when I told her I had to talk to Auntie Mimi.

I tell ya it made me feel loved.

This morning instead of getting up at 6:15 to get ready for work I got to sleep in until 7:20!!! WOO HOO! Unfortunately, I didn't' get to sleep until almost 1 am since I was up reading. *sigh* when will I ever learn??

I was going through my photobucket account today

I found this video of Zabba when she was approximately 9-10 months old. I'm not sure what's funnier-what she's doing, or my mom's laugh!

Very UNexpected-read at your own risk there is death involved

Yesterday was a great day until approximately 4pm.

Here's how it played out:

Christina: "Hey, can one of you go and pick up my mom from work? The paramedics are at Gramma Taylor's and they are having trouble reviving her and Kathie is freaking out" (Kathie is Nichole's mom)

Me: "Sure, I can do it."

So I drove to pick up Val and shortly after she got into the car we found out that the paramedics were not able to revive her and they stopped their efforts (this was after doing CPR on her for 38 minutes and doing everything they possible could to save her life).

Val and I went to Gramma Taylor's house and when we arrived Nichole's dad was sitting on the steps and looking at the paramedics that were in the ally discussing something.

Jim: "Hey, Kathie's in the house. Mrs. Taylor isn't in there"

Val and I walked into the house to comfort Kathie and that's when we discovered he meant Gramma Taylor wasn't in the ambulance. She was laying on the dining room floor with a white blanket pulled over her covering all but her hands, her left foot and part of her right leg. Someone put a pillow under her head so she'd be more comfortable-the pillow case had pink flowers on it.

Normally a dead body doesn't really bother me because they are usually in the casket and have clothes and makeup on. However, I was not expecting to see her in the house and to be honest it was not something I wanted to see. I felt as if I was walking into a movie set and that CSI was going to show up to tag the place and find things that shouldn't have been left by someone who was trying to do her harm. I found that if I thought about it in that light the severity of being in a room with a newly deceased person didn't seem so...oh I don't know...maybe morbid is the word I'm looking for.

Later on in the evening we discovered the reason Kathie was "freaking out" is because Gramma Taylor had called her minutes before because she wasn't feeling well. Kathie ran over to Gramma Taylor's house (they are about a half a block from each other) and when she got there Gramma Taylor was still alive, and told Kathie that she had been throwing up and needed some water. Kathie went to get her a glass of water and when she came back Gramma Taylor was gasping for breath. Kathie called 911 and started CPR. While she was on the phone with 911 she was instructed to put her on the floor to do the compressions but Kathie wasn't strong enough to mover her to the floor. I'm almost positive that Kathie is upset because she feel's partly responsible for her dying. I really do hope Kathie realizes she did what she could to save her.

All in all it was a long, sad day.

So to Gramma Taylor, I wish you much peace and a smooth journey.

If you've made it this far, thanks for listening.

I hate the waiting game

Well, I've faxed all of my paperwork to the surgeons office for the appeal. The insurance company has 30 days to get back to me and let me know if I get approved.

I really hate the waiting game!

Bored out of my ever-loving mind

I have been so bored with life lately that I don't know what to do. I could/should clean my house and go outside to play with Zabba, but you know I just feel like sitting and reading a book. However, I"m bored with my book choices. I've read them all. I think it's time for a Library run.

Or, maybe I'll use my new sewing machine and make a quilt. We have a friend of ours that is having a little girl and I think a new baby blanket would be perfect!

That will be way more fun than cleaning the house!

On a different note-Zabba got a big girl bike for her birthday and she is really getting good at peddling it. However, she does have some issues with watching where she is going so she runs into things. Oh well! I guess it's all a learning process.

What a great find, although be it a bit hairy!

Yesterday I made a vow to get back into this whole blogging thing. I know I didn't make it on here, because quite frankly that didn't work the last 2 times.

Well, I was checking out some other blogs and started thinking about Zabba (this happens quite frequently) and her hair issues and I thought to myself (see I told you!) I wonder if there are any hair blogs. So I started searching and OMG I found some really cute blogs with some really great hair do's!!!

Below are my favorites:

Babes in Hairland

Girly Do's

Hair for the Mini Diva (I personally love this one because her little model is the same age as Zabba and they have the same haircut!!)

The Story of a Princess and Her Hair (this is the one that started it all for me..very cute!!)

The Wright Hair (I love this one too because of the toddler styles!)

All of them are absolute fabulous and they all give great step by step instructions with pictures so you can see what they are talking about. Many of them also have great giveaways!!!

Ok so it's been 2 months and 1 day

I know I have become horrible at posting on here and I really don't know what to say other than _______________. Yeah, I can't think of anything.

Things have been very busy in our house. Zabba has officially turned 3 and has also become a very picky eater and very funny! Just the other day I walked into the livingroom and she started sniffing...below is the conversation we had:

Zabba: *sniff* *sniff* Mommy do you know why I'm sniffing.
Me: No, why?
Zabba: Because I'm galergic (allergic) to you!

What a nutter!

Other than that, there really hasn't been too terribly much going on other than the usual stresses throughout the day.

Twirl factor

One of the things I was never informed of when I was pregnant is that you must compute the twirl factor when considering purchasing a dress for the darling little bipolar snot factory, also known as the female toddler.

Don't get me wrong, I love her even if she is bi-polar and insists on wiping her boogers on my nice new clean shirt that happens to be dark in color and shows any and all nose kisses.

However, I am not cut out for the 1-2 hour temper tantrums that ensue when I get the twirl factor wrong on a dress.

A B C's of Me

The Mom Jen over at Cheaper Than Therapy did a Meme and I thought it was great. So, since I'm feeling like a copy cat today I shall do it to.

A
• Are you available? Depends on your definition of available.
• What is your age? 29
• What annoys you? Lots. Most currently though would be the co-worker that won't leave me alone on my lunch break.

B
• Do you know anyone named Billy? Yep, he's a crackhead.
• When is your birthday? Feb 22.
• Who is your best friend? I have 3-my hubby, my sister and Nichole.

C
• What's your favorite candy? Chocolate.
• Crush? Brendan Fraser-yummy!
• When was the last time you cried? Cinco de Mayo.

D
• Do you daydream? All the time, today it was about winning the lottery and what I would do with 222 smackerals.
• What's your favorite kind of dog? The 3-legged boxer kind.
• What day of the week is it? Wednesday.

E
• How do you like your eggs? Over-easy cut up into my hashbrowns.
• Have you ever been in the emergency room? As a patient-no; as a parent of the patient-yes.
• Ever pet an elephant? No.

F
• Do you use fly swatters? Yes, or a newspaper.
• Have you ever used a foghorn? I don't have a need for one, so no.
• Is there a fan in your room? Yep, two of them as a matter of fact.

G
• Do you chew gum? Yes.
• Do you like gummy candies? They're alright, not my favorite though.
• Do you like gory movies? No.

H
• How are you? A bit ornery because I'm bored out of my mind and stuck at work for 4 1/2 more hours.
• What's your height?. 5' 9".
• What color is your hair? Brown, Red and very little blond.

I
• What's your favorite ice cream? Phish food or Mint Chip
• Have you ever ice skated? I don't know if I would call it skating; more like ice sitting or ice falling.
• Ever been in an igloo? Yep, at the winter carnival.

J
• What's your favorite Jelly Bean? Orange!
• Have you ever heard a really hilarious joke? Yep.
• Do you wear jewelry? Wedding ring.

K
• Do you know Karate? I know a move or two, but please don't ask me to show you-it's not a pretty sight.
• Have you ever flown a kite? Yep! Just brought Zabba the other day.
• Do you think kangaroos are cute? No, not really.

L
• Are you laidback? Most of the time.
• Lions or Tigers? Neither, they could eat me.
• Do you like black licorice? NO! only Twizzlers.

M
• Favorite movie as a kid? Mary Poppins, Ferris Bueller's Day Off or Encino Man.
• Ever shopped at Moosejaw? Never heard of it.
• Favorite store at the mall? Not a fan of the malls, but if I have to go I like the kids stores.


N
• Do you have a nickname? Yep.
• Whats your favorite number? 7
• Do you prefer night or day? Day.

O
• What's your one wish? Healthy family.
• Are you an only child? Nope.
• Do you like the color orange? It's alright.

P
• What are you most paranoid about? Getting hit by a car.
• Piercings? Ears.
• Do you know anyone named Penelope? Nope.

Q
• Are you quick to judge people? Sometimes.
• Do you like Quaker Oats? Eh...
• Know anyone that makes quilts? Yep.

R
• Do you think you're always right? No.
• Do you watch reality TV? Sometimes.
• Best Rock Band of all time? Hmmm, I'm going to have to think on this one.

S
• Do you prefer sun or rain? Sun.
• Do you like snow? Not really.
• What's your favorite season? Spring.

T
• time is it? 12:09pm
• What time did you wake up? 7:06am.

U
• Can you ride a unicycle? LMAO, No.
• Do you know anyone with a unibrow? Yes!
• Uncles do you have? Lots on both sides of the family.

V
• What’s the worst vegetable? Squash, which I think is technically a fruit but it's still disgusting.
• Did you ever watch Veggie Tales? Nope.
• Ever considered being vegan? No, I like dairy too much.

W
• What's your worst habit? I have a few of them.
• Do you like water rides? Yes.
• Ever been inside a windmill? No.

X
• Have you ever had an x-ray? Several.
• Ever used a Xerox machine? I'm a clerical worker so, yes.

Y
• Do you like the color yellow? It's alright.
• What year were you born? 80.
• Do you yell when you're angry? YES!

Z
• Do you believe in the zodiac? Yes.
• What's your zodiac sign? I'm a Pisces
• What do you think of when you hear the word Zero? Nothing.

Beautful

Beautiful weather out today. Think I'm going to go to a BBQ.

Happy Memorial Day!

Momdot and a boat load of giveaways!

Tricia from momdot is turning 31 on May 31st and in honor of her birthday a bunch of her friends are giving away gifts and having contests. To enter the contests and to see what's available, check out the various sites.

I personally am entering the one for the flat iron since mine broke and I really need a good one to tame these tresses. This contest is done by a mom with a daughter who has some seriously beautiful hair. Her blog is dedicated to the different hairstyles she does and it's very cute! I love the easy to follow step by step instructions.

I am definitely going to have to try some of these out when Abby's hair get's long again.

I know, I'm sorry!

I know I said I would be better about blogging and that I had some really cute stories to share; which I do. However, life has gotten in my way yet again. I know, likely excuse, but that's all I have.

So as a fun little hello, I'm still here; here's a video to keep you smiling.

OK

I realize it's been a month and a half since my last post and I would really like to say-where did the time fly?!

Oh yeah, that's right.

It went right out the window while I was going to school, playing with Abby, dealing with icky tummies (both her's and mine), going to doctor appointments, and going to school full time.

I think it's time I shut the window and try and get some of that time stuff back in my house. So I'm going to be taking some time to get back into blogging and to hopefully give you some insight to what a crazy life I'm leading.

I promise to make more of an effort to get on here and get some things posted. I have pictures and such that I would like to share with you. Some funny, some cute.

Thanks!

You like me!! You really like me!!!

I apologize in advance, but I must shout!



I GOT MY FIRST AWARD!!!!!!



My friend Jennie B gave me an award! YAY!





It sure did make my dull day brighter. Her son is right "She is the best gal ever"

Ok, so here's what I must do:

"These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award."

So here's who I am choosing:
1. Tori over at the sweet jelly bean
2. The Clan Piccini at The Clan Piccini
3. Michelle at Second Chances
4. All the ladies at The Misfits Guide to Motherhood (I do blog on this one as well, but I'm not the only one. The other moms on there have some really great stories)

Satchel Giveaway!!

So for some odd reason I woke up at 3:30 this morning. Not quite sure why (well, I am, but I don't really want to share ALL of the random thoughts running through my head-I don't want to bore you to death).
Well, long story short, I decided it would be a good thing to get up and shower (you're welcome) and then pop on the computer and see what's happening in blog land.

So I got on the internet (fun thing) and stopped over to my friend Jennie B's at Learning to Adjust which linked me to her friend's blog which is I know, right?! that then linked me to The Sweet Jelly Bean who is having a really great giveaway on these AWESOME Satchels! I personally looooooovvveee #11!

Check it out!

4 by 4

My good friend Jennie over at Learning to Adjust tagged me in a fun picture game. So I thought I should play.



But first the rules:

1. Go to the fourth folder in your picture folder


2. Find the fourth picture


3. Post it


4. Tell the story

Simple right! So let's see what we come up with!

This picture was taken at WalMart in Balsam Lake, WI. She is wearing her first Easter dress and she did NOT want to smile for the camera at all. I look back at it now and I can't believe how BALD she was!

Awww...I miss my little baby!

I will have to come back later and tag some folks but first I must figure out their blog addresses....hmmmm

Communication

When you have a child, communication is key. If you don't have communication, the shi.....stuff can really hit the fan.

Today while Zabba was going potty first thing in the morning, it didn't sound right. I asked her if her butt hurt (meaning is she constipated) and she said yes. I tried to rack my brain and the last time she went that I could recall was on Monday. Well, I gave her some medicine sent her off to daycare.

I called daycare when I got to work because I had forgot to tell the daycare provider about me giving her some medicine to "help" her along. I found out that she had went to the bathroom yesterday-this is where communication would have really come in handy.

I went to pick up Zabba from daycare and she had on a different outfit than what I sent her in. I said "Uh Oh" was there an accident.

Aparently the laxative took effect while she was sleeping...in their bed. Oooops. She ruined their $100.00 bed spread and her new outfit she had on today.

Again, I repeat...communication is key.

Mommy! I got DOG HAIR!!!

Our boxer, Princess Ilean, is in the process of shedding her winter coat. This means that there is dog hair EVERYWHERE in my home. Well, my husband and my daughter are a little (a lot) OCD about getting dog hair on their clothes and get irritated that she would be so rude as to get some hair on them while they are...*gasp* petting her.

Well, Abby was standing at the top of the stairs and Princess was standing next to her waiting patiently for her to go down the stairs and below is the conversation that ensued:

Abby yelled "OH NO!!! MooooOOOOmmmYYY!!!"
Me: "What sweetie"
A: "Princess got DOG HAIR on me"
M: "Oh no! What are you going to do?!"
A: "Shave the dog."

Kids say the darndest things....

Yesterday I was playing on the internet during my lunch break at work. As usual, I check on my friends on my baby board say Hi see how everyone is doing, then if I have time I will usually pop over to The Pioneer Woman's website and see what's happening over there. (If you've never been there, it's really a great site and she is so much fun! Also, she's been nominated for several bloggies so if you get the chance, vote for your favorites at the bloggies website).

Well, since she was nominated, she wanted to thank everyone and held a contest (which she does quite often and has wonderful prizes). As part of the contest she asked for blogs that were not nominated. One of sites on there was http://kazooisms.blogspot.com/. This child, whom ever she is, says some of the funniest things I have heard come out of a toddlers mouth in a long time. You should check it out!

It also reminds me of some of the things that Abby will say from time to time.

Like this morning at 3:00am when she woke me up.
Abby: "Mommy, wake up, wake up!"
Me: "Huhn.....What?! What's wrong honey?"
A: "I'm all done going to bed"

Or the time she yelled at my step-dad for saying damnit.

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For those of you who don't speak Zabba, she said My name is Zabba and I'm 2.

Sweet Child o Miiiiiiiinnnnneeeeeeeee

OK, sorry, that was a really bad attempt at trying to sound like Axle Rose from Guns N Roses. I promise I will never try and do that again. Well, at least in this post.

So I'm sitting here watching my very sweet darling daughter play in the area under the stairs where I store her toys (well, I try to store them there, but they are usually strewn about the house). And this is when it hits me (again) that I gave birth to this child and how blessed I am that this miracle has come into my life.

Then, she came up to me, gave me a great big hug and said "Mommy, you are my best friend ever I see." Awww!

Turns out she was just hungry for some grapes, but that's OK. At least she likes me and now I have documentation of it so when she's older and tells me she hates my guts, I can come back to this post.

A little overwhelmed

So, I decided recently that I would like to go to school to get a degree so I can make more money. Because let's face it-without money you can't have "stuff" and we all like "stuff"-you know like food and water and clean clothes.

Well, I decided that since my full time job gives me money so I can buy "stuff" that I should keep it and go to school so I can get my degree so I can earn more money. Great idea righ?!?! So, now I work full time and take 3 classes online. This in addition to chasing a 2 year old around the house while I'm also taking the time to make dinner, do the dishes, pick up various toys, play and what not.

So, I'm going to admit something that no one knows (well, now except you). I'm really overwhelmed.

Busy time of year

Well, it's that time of year at work where everyone one and anyone decides to call in and ask questions. Today while I was on the phone checking voice mail messages, I got 3 more messages. These things don't stop!!! The nice thing about it is that I only work my 40 hours and then go home, put my feet up have my husband massage them and fall asleep while I dream of sexy fire fighters with gleaming bodies and....yeah right!

Then I wake up and realize that I was dreaming and I'm about to go into work and answer the 40,000 phone calls, go pick up Abby from daycare, go home, make dinner, do some homework, give a bath, pick up toys, play babies and blocks and any other game she can think all while watching Dora the Explorer for the umpteen millionth time.

Oh yeah, reality is way more satisfying than that dream!